Sunday, 8 May 2016

This blog is now dead... find me on

This blog is now inactive... so if you've stumbled here, or fallen out of Pinterest, have a look at as that's where any new posts will appear, and also be available to buy as prints, canvases and that sort of thing.

Thursday, 13 November 2014

I love you like an Eskimo hand grenade

We’re ridin’, little lady
Come and suck some milk from my titties
I love you like an eskimo hand grenade
Pull the clip little baby lets explode today

Tuesday, 24 September 2013

The Bike (Quotes by people I know #5)

Quote #5
Micky AGAIN. I received this as a text at around 8am. I really don't think he was joking either.

Monday, 9 September 2013

Sunday, 8 September 2013

BFFs (Quotes from people I know #3)

Quote #3
Micky. I started a Twitter account with my friend Jem, to keep a track on the endless abuse we received from Micky. We gave up after about a month because we couldn't tweet the diatribes we were receiving in time. See the Twitter account here:

Tuesday, 30 July 2013

All That Milk (Quotes from people I know #1)

Quote #1
By Paul, my old tattooist in Ruislip. He was mad, and is probably dead now.

Thursday, 3 January 2013

Try harder to be better.

A wise man (@pugsta) once told me this. He doesn't look like a potato with ears though.
And his eyes are only cold and dead on a Thursday. Mmmm.

Monday, 24 December 2012

The Unhappy Calendar (In Full):

And so here it is. In all its miserable glory. The Unhappy Calendar. A year's worth of lugubrious drudge and melancholy. Enjoy!

Sunday, 23 December 2012

My favourite Christmas YouTube Comment is:

The award-winning Christmas YouTube comment comes from a page showing the new John Lewis advert. You know, the stupid one with the snowman.

Friday, 30 November 2012

Journey to the End of the Night

If you haven't read 'Journey to the End of the Night' by Celiné, you probably should. It's funny. Bitter, but funny.